100 Things Everyone Should Know About Sex (But Probably Doesn't)

Think you know everything there is to know about sex? Think again!

Sex is one of the most talked-about subjects in the world, yet somehow, there are still so many things people don't understand about their own bodies, pleasure, relationships, and sexual health.

We learn about sex from friends, movies, pornography, partners, and sometimes a very awkward health class. But how much of that information is actually accurate?

To celebrate our 100th episode of Taboo Talk: Not Safe for Brunch, we decided to share 100 things we believe everyone should know about sex.

Not 100 rules. Not 100 things you're doing wrong. Just 100 reminders, facts, and conversations that might change how you think about intimacy.

Here are some of our biggest takeaways.

1. Your Body Doesn't Always Work the Way You Think It Should

Let's start with something that surprises a lot of people: physical arousal and sexual desire aren't always the same thing.

An erection doesn't automatically mean someone wants sex, just as vaginal lubrication doesn't necessarily mean someone is sexually interested.

Our bodies can respond physically without our minds being on the same page.

Other things worth knowing:

• Men can experience sexual pain, difficulty reaching orgasm, and changes in erections.

• The clitoris is much larger than the small external portion most people recognize.

• Ejaculation and orgasm are two different physiological events.

• Hormones, stress, medications, and sleep can affect sexual functioning.

• Genitals naturally come in different shapes, sizes, and appearances.

The takeaway? Stop comparing your body to what you see online or what you think is supposed to happen.

2. Orgasms Aren't the Only Measure of Good Sex

Somewhere along the way, we started treating orgasms like the finish line of sex.

But what if we stopped doing that?

Orgasms can be wonderful, but they're not the only reason people have sex. Pleasure, connection, intimacy, relaxation, and exploration matter too.

Not everyone orgasms through penetration. Some people require clitoral stimulation, others enjoy different sensations, and some experience changes in how they orgasm throughout their lives.

And here's an important reminder: Your partner isn't a mind reader, and your orgasm shouldn't be treated like a performance evaluation.

Learning what feels good, communicating your preferences, and removing the pressure to reach a particular outcome can make intimacy more enjoyable for everyone.

3. You Don't Always Have to Be Horny Before Sex

Ever wonder why you don't randomly feel like having sex the way you did when you first started dating?

Welcome to the world of responsive desire.

For some people, sexual desire appears spontaneously. For others, interest develops after affectionate touch, emotional connection, or enjoyable stimulation has already begun.

Neither experience is inherently wrong.

Long-term relationships, daily responsibilities, exhaustion, and stress can all influence desire.

And having a lower libido than your partner doesn't automatically mean your relationship is in trouble.

The important part is understanding how desire works for each person, respecting boundaries, and recognizing that nobody is obligated to continue sexual activity simply because they started exploring it.

4. Communication Might Be the Sexiest Skill You Have

We talk about communication constantly on our podcast, and for good reason.

You can have all the chemistry in the world, but if you can't talk about what feels good, what doesn't, and what you need, things can get complicated.

A few reminders:

• Asking what your partner enjoys is better than guessing.
• Consent is ongoing and can be withdrawn at any time.
• Saying no doesn't require a lengthy explanation.
• Talking about sex outside the bedroom can make conversations easier.
• Asking for something doesn't mean your partner has to agree.

And perhaps most importantly, having a conversation about your sex life doesn't mean something is wrong.

Sometimes it simply means you want to make something good even better.

5. Your Sex Life Doesn't Expire at 40, 50, or Beyond

Can we please retire the idea that great sex is reserved for people in their twenties?

Bodies change as we age. Hormones fluctuate, erections may become less predictable, vaginal tissue can change during menopause, and arousal may take longer.

But none of that means pleasure has to disappear.

In fact, many people find that sex becomes more satisfying as they get older because they understand their bodies, communicate more confidently, and feel less pressure to impress anyone.

Lubricant, different positions, longer arousal time, and a willingness to experiment can all help accommodate changes.

Great sex isn't about having the body you had at 25. It's about learning to enjoy the body you have today.

6. Sexual Health Is About More Than Avoiding Pregnancy

Sexual health deserves the same attention as any other part of your overall health.

Unfortunately, misinformation and embarrassment still prevent people from having important conversations.

Here are a few things everyone should understand:

• Many sexually transmitted infections (STIs) can occur without noticeable symptoms.
• You cannot determine someone's STI status by looking at them.
• Oral sex can transmit certain STIs.
• Condoms and other barriers can reduce the risk of STI transmission.
• Regular testing is a responsible part of sexual wellness.
• Urinating after sex does not prevent STIs.

Getting tested shouldn't be treated as an accusation or a sign of distrust.

It's about looking after yourself and your partners.

7. Pleasure Doesn't Have to Follow a Script

Kissing, foreplay, penetration, orgasm, done.

Sound familiar?

There's nothing wrong with that sequence if everyone enjoys it, but who decided it had to happen that way every single time?

Pleasure doesn't follow a universal instruction manual.

Sometimes slowing down, exploring different types of touch, using lubricant, or changing your routine can make a huge difference.

Your brain also plays an important role in sexual pleasure. Feeling comfortable, relaxed, emotionally connected, and mentally engaged can influence the experience.

And remember, pleasure isn't something you earn by looking a certain way.

You deserve to feel good in your body exactly as it is.

8. Sex Toys and Masturbation Are Nothing to Be Embarrassed About

Masturbation isn't a consolation prize for people who aren't having partnered sex.

It's a perfectly valid way to experience pleasure and learn about your body.

Understanding what you enjoy can also make communicating with a partner much easier.

Sex toys can be part of solo exploration or partnered intimacy, and they don't have to replace anything or anyone.

A few things to keep in mind:

• Vibrators don't permanently destroy sexual sensitivity, although intense stimulation can temporarily change how sensations feel.
• More vibration power doesn't always mean more pleasure.
• Lubricant can improve comfort and sensation.
• Toys should be cleaned according to their instructions.
• Nonporous, body-safe materials are generally easier to clean thoroughly.
• Anything used anally should have a secure, flared base designed to prevent it from slipping inside.

Experimentation should always come with a little common sense and attention to safety.

9. A Great Relationship Doesn't Automatically Mean Great Sex

You can deeply love your partner and still experience challenges in your sex life.

You can also have incredible sexual chemistry with someone and struggle in other areas of the relationship.

The two aren't automatically connected.

Desire differences, resentment, stress, communication difficulties, and changing life circumstances can all influence intimacy.

Keeping score about who initiates, who gets rejected, or how often sex happens usually doesn't help.

Instead, couples benefit from curiosity, honest conversations, and a willingness to adapt.

What worked five years ago might not work today, and that's okay.

Your relationship and your sex life are allowed to evolve.

10. There Is No Universal Normal When It Comes to Sex

How often should couples have sex?

How long should sex last?

How many orgasms should someone have?

Are we doing enough?

These are some of the questions people ask most often.

But here's the thing: An average isn't a rule, and what works for one person or couple might not work for another.

Some couples have sex several times a week. Others are happy with less frequent intimacy.

Some people love toys, others don't. Some enjoy experimentation, while others prefer familiarity.

The important questions are whether everyone involved feels comfortable, respected, and satisfied with their intimate life.

Stop chasing someone else's version of normal.

100 Episodes Later, We're Still Learning

After 100 episodes of Taboo Talk: Not Safe for Brunch, one thing has become very clear: nobody knows everything about sex.

Our bodies change. Our relationships change. Our desires change. And the conversations we have about intimacy should keep changing too.

That's why we started this podcast.

To ask uncomfortable questions, challenge outdated beliefs, share experiences, and make sexual wellness something people can discuss without shame.

And honestly? We're just getting started.

Want to hear all 100 things we think everyone should know about sex?

Join Amber, Coralie, and Vicki for our milestone 100th episode of Taboo Talk: Not Safe for Brunch. Expect plenty of useful information, a few surprises, some laughs, and the unfiltered conversations you've come to expect from us.

🎧 Watch Episode 100: 100 Things Everyone Should Know About Sex

Watch the full episode on YouTube

Here's to 100 episodes, countless conversations, and plenty more taboos left to tackle!

Taboo Talk: Not Safe for Brunch, where we talk about the things everyone thinks about but not everyone is willing to say out loud.